Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Unique Randomness

My random thoughts…brought to you once a week!
  • Why are 9 out of 10 deli-counter workers complete morons? On top of that, they’re insanely slow and always pissed off. Is the deli like the wasteland for grocery store employees? I wouldn’t trust most of those people with a mop, much less handling finely cured meats alongside a slicer.
  • Keeping with grocery stores…try this little experiment the next time you’re about to check-out. Spot two lines…go to the line that looks like it will take longer. I bet you’ll be finished before the other one. Try it.
  • We rented Hot Tub Time Machine. Ummm, I spent a $1.08 for it and still felt like I got robbed. I love comedies. I love stupid, silly comedies. Hot Tub got the stupid part down, but without the laughter. John Cusak should be ashamed. Best Cusak film: Better Off Dead. Most Underrated Cusak Film: The Sure Thing. Worst Cusak film: Con-Air.
  • Foods Getting Smaller Alert: Reese’s Cups now have the circumference of a quarter. This is not a good thing. My little one likes Nutri Grain Bars ( I can’t stand them). My goodness they’ve shrunk through the years.
  • Facebook Folly of the Week: The Weight Watcher I don’t care that you’re on a diet. No one does. I sure as heck don’t need a daily synopsis of your rabbit food. Does this look familiar? “Hey everyone, today I had an English muffin for breakfast, a Lite Hot Pocket for lunch, and for dinner I drank six glasses of water.” Great…let me know how that diarrhea is treating you.
  • Gym Membership: Slippery When Wet Hate to get all gender specific on this one, but Slippery When Wet is always a dude. SWW does thirty minutes on the treadmill and then hits the weight machines. One small problem…dipsh*t doesn’t bring a towel with him. As much as all these other gym people annoy me, SWW is the worst. I want to punch SWW. Me and my germaphobe ways don’t like SWW. Please stop marking your territory with sweat secretion.


mickiruns said...

i also notice that employees at deli places have about a million tattoos, numerous piercings and crazy hair color...

viveksurti said...


It's part of the code - wipe when you finish.

Kevin said...

@micki...why do they have to look so pissed off far as grocery store jobs go, deli dude would be at the top of my list.

@vivek...I think what you wrote should be posted over each machine in the gym.

Medifast Coupons said...

Thank you so much for the laugh and smile that I think I will carry around for the rest of the day, thanks!!!!